I Don’t Understand Why You’re Single

I have never used my blog as a platform for a rant but today, I must (and it’s my blog so I can write whatever the hell I like).

“I don’t understand why you’re single, you’re a good looking successful girl” 

Read that again.

Firstly, let’s address how superficial and down right mean that comment is, not to mention how utterly stupid and misinformed you sound. So I’m good looking, right…therefore I must be in a relationship? and what do you say to people that you consider not good looking? “Yeah I understand why you’re single because you’re so ugly and all” and what about if I were less successful? “Oh that makes sense for not being in a relationship, because you’re a failure.”

Secondly, you’re insinuating that there must be something wrong with people when they’re single. You’re an ignoramus. I sometimes wonder how you got a girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband to put up with you and your teeny tiny fixed mindset.

And finally, my favourite would be “Don’t worry, you’ll find him” – the generalisation that floods my world nowadays is that being single is terrible and that the ultimate goal in life is to be in a relationship and meet ‘the one’ (Disney brainwashed much?) Bull. And the sooner you evolve past your archaic mentality the better for both of us. Just a reminder, this is 2017 – we are at the peak of equality, freedom of choice, empowerment, fertility indifferences, and female sexual autonomy…so please keep up.

I am single because I choose to be single, not because no-one chose me.

The amount of times I’ve been verbally attacked by people bewildered that I am single and that I don’t want to follow (like a sheep) the protocol – I know it scares you, a woman you don’t understand, so here is some insight into my mind – I have one life and I’m going to choose to live it the way I see fit, not the way I’ve been told to live it by society, history, traditions or bullying. I have been questioned relentlessly, misunderstood, patronised and the most hurtful…isolated and excluded from social gatherings because I am single. This is not acceptable behaviour.

So before you assume someone is unhappy being single, ask them. I can guarantee the answer will be “hell yes!”…followed by a “high five sister!” and a champagne cork popping in the background.

Everyday I decide to be single, in a tinder fairytale…I could be in a relationship with someone, anyone, human, goat or tree, anytime, tomorrow, but my life choice right now is to be single – and my quality of life feels no different because of this. But I do wonder why it bothers you so much?

I put to you, if society has stigmatised single people to be unhappy, then to be happy you must be married? How many married people do you know that are happy? See, the point is mute as it is irrelevant. Marital status does not determine happiness or success.

To the people that judge me to my face or often behind my back because I am a woman that intimidates you with my forward thinking, confuses you and leaves you feeling uneasy because you don’t understand how I live my life with such freedom – I am a woman that doesn’t need a relationship to feel fulfilled, that doesn’t want to get married because it has no value to her, and I am a woman that is bossing life successfully and actually enjoys being single **shock horror!

So let me make this perfectly clear for your societal conformed and robotic little brains to comprehend – I am happy in my life and yes I am single, they do go together.

With Love and Lust,


(Aka Samantha Jones spirit animal)

Disclaimer: I few things may pop up in your feels from this blog. Lets clear them up before any keyboard warriors get trigger happy.

1) I love marriage. I think it’s beautiful. It can be done well, and successfully – so this is not a blog discrediting being in a relationship and/or being married, I’m simply saying – its not for me and people shouldn’t push their beliefs on others.

2) These are my feels, not yours. You don’t even need to get it, just nod and look away.

3) I hope that from this blog people who apply stigma and generalise their single friends can now see a different point of view.